Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Summer Movies Preview -- the Sequel

Part one was yesterday.  (Again tonight, I'll be callin' 'em if I see 'em -- Mariners/Tigers at 7 EDT on 710 ESPN Seattle and MLB.COM)

COWBOYS & ALIENS – “Them’s the damndest injuns I ever did see.”

AN INVISIBLE SIGN – Jessica Alba as a teacher. Will do great business only if her clothes are invisible.

PASSION PLAY – Studio synopsis: Mickey Rourke as a jazz musician and a woman with wings. So Mickey Rourke as a drug addict.

THE HIGH COST OF LIVING – Another Hollywood “meet cute”. Zach Braff hits a pregnant woman with his car.

JUDY MOODY AND THE NOT BUMMER SUMMER – Two Iraqi soldiers, with limbs missing, must crawl across the punishing desert to…Oh wait. That’s a different movie. This one is about third graders on summer vacation.

BEGINNERS – Ewan McGregor learns his dad, Christopher Plummer is gay. Really? He didn’t know? Christopher Plummer?

BAD TEACHER – I’m intrigued. Directed by Jake Kasdan, Cameron Diaz stars as the world’s worst teacher. Also features Justin Timberlake and Jason Segel. Could be funny.

HORRIBLE BOSSES – What is going on in the workforce these days???

A BETTER LIFE – Mexican gardener tries to keep his son out of dangerous gangs, or worse – Arizona.

THE ART OF GETTING BY – Sundance darling. High school student must complete a year’s worth of assignments in three weeks. Impossible for most people.  Aaron Sorkin could do it in two weeks.

GREEN LANTERN – Not to be confused with Green Hornet, Jolly Green Giant, or Mean Joe Green. Another comic book comes to life starring Ryan Reynolds as the superhero who obviously can’t see in the dark. By the way, I love the mask.  No one could ever identify him with that

MR. POPPER’S PENGUINS – Remember Dick Van Dyke and the cute penguins in MARY POPPINS? Now imagine the same thing but for ninety minutes and with Jim Carrey mugging.

X-MEN: FIRST CLASS – The prequel to the other X-Men movies. MUPPET BABIES meets SMALLVILLE.

BEAUTIFUL BOY – Martin Sheen’s kid shoots up his school. Probably blaming Chuck Lorre.

JUST LIKE US – A group of Arab-American comics go on tour. No. Really.

TROLLHUNTER – When a Real Housewife of Beverly Hills loses a maid or chef or dog walker, who’s she gonna call?

CONAN O’BRIEN CAN’T STOP – Documentary that is supposed to be awesome chronicling Coco’s unceremonious departure from NBC and finally landing at – where is he again?—Oh right. TBS.

The Previews wrap up tomorrow.

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